the_lioness | (no subject)

(no subject)

*Alanna sits on the window seat in what was once Val's room, staring out at the grey sky. The bleak weather matches her mood perfectly. Peter's mother had whisked her away and taken care of most of the bleeding. Very few questions had been asked. Squeezing her eyes shut at the memory of Mrs. Wiggin's kindness, Alanna calls herself ten different types of fool. She had invaded this woman's home and bled on her floor. In return, she had been patched up, given food and a place to rest. She also has clean clothes, which improved matters immensely.

She isn't entirely certain she deserves such treatment.

Sighing, Alanna tucks the blanket around her legs and wonders how long she can sit here, pretending she isn't going quietly insane. All she can think about is getting back to Milliways; it's easier than thinking about Peter.*

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A knock on the door, that's all it takes; and Peter is sinking himself into willing insanity.

Why is he here? What is he doing? He knows to stay clear of this woman. He knows she's bad news. What the fuck had he been trying to convince his parents earlier, before finally giving up because they were being as stubborn as all get out?

It was his damned curiousity, that's why he was here.

She was somehow convinced she knew him.

And he wanted to know why.

And so, he knocks on the door. And waits. He doesn't really have to; it's his damned house after all, but... he waits.

*Alanna flinches at the sudden, sharp sound. She's tempted to ignore it, but can't bring herself to be that rude to Peter's parents. She doesn't even consider that it might be Peter. The look of disgust in his eyes had said more than enough. Leaning her head back against the wall, she calls out.*

Enter.

And thus he does. Once again, he doesn't need to wait for her approval in his own house; and yet, he does. Wonder why. Play this carefully, boy... very, very carefully.

He enters, and he holds out a bottle of aspirin, as if a peace offering. "Thought you might be needing this."

*Startled, Alanna gives him a wide-eyed stare. Goddess, Goddess, GODDESS. I can't take much more of this. Dropping her gaze to the bottle, she bites her lip and reaches out for it with a shaky hand.*

Thanks. This is certainly unexpected. I was under the impression that you wanted nothing more to do with me.

"I have no idea who you are." Peter points out. "All I know is this notion you're putting out that you know me."

He drops onto Val's bed, sits there. He is distinctly aware that this is a move that would have gotten his ass reamed in the early days; rather than causing some sort of pleasure in the fact he's doing something Val would hate, it causes more guilt than anything. Lovely. But he does not get up.

"So. Why? How?"

*Alanna looks at him plaintively. The room seems unnaturally silent after he finishes speaking, almost as if the walls themselves wait with bated breath for her answer. Her gaze lands on a few small stacks of books. How appropriately Val. Alanna's breath catches, and she wishes fervently that Val could be here. She would know what to do. Somewhere in another room, a clock ticks loudly. Alanna feels her headache worsen with each passing second.*

I told you how. I'm not sure why. I'm beginning to think it was all some grand cosmic joke. *She squeezes her eyes shut.* I met you at Milliways Bar. You were a waiter there, and I was... am on the security staff.

"Go on." Peter's voice is full of 'prove it', but he doesn't actually go out and say it. He even almost winces a little at the tone. Not the right way to do this.

I taught you a few things with a sword. *She pauses, chewing on her lower lip.* You told me things about your childhood. About Ender. *Alanna narrows her eyes. Nothing she says is going to truly matter in the long run. Smirking, she decides to try and shock him.*

One day you kissed me, and I kissed you back. There you have it. That's the short version.

*She turns back to the window, almost afraid to breathe.*

Peter raises an eyebrow. Alright. Delusional and insane. He doesn't even address that. "And what did I tell you about my childhood?"

He has to hear this.

*Ouch. Alanna sighs, wishing she could see a way out of this mess.*

You have a small scar on the back of your neck from the monitor. You lost it when you were four. It infuriated you that Ender was selected to go to Battle School and you were not.

*She faces him again, shifting slightly to ease the pain in her side.*

Peter blinks, surprised for a moment; but only a moment. Right. And who couldn't gather that information?

But, despite himself, he's a little more open to listen now. Not that he's aware of this consciously. "Anybody could know that."

*Frustrated, Alanna buries her head in her hands and mutters a few choice curse words. Still grumbling, she looks at Peter askance.*

Yes. Fine. *Alanna looks out the window, hesitant to utter the words that will finally prove to him that she knows more about him than the average person does. She's hesitant not because of the subject matter, but because she knows how it affects him. Staring at the land surrounding the house, she wonders where the bonfire actually burned.*

You built a bonfire after Ender left, correct?

What... the... hell?

And here Peter tries to clamp down, show little emotion. He tries to be logical and cold, and just say, "And?"

It possibly doesn't quite work. But at least he tried, damnit.

*Alanna turns around and quirks an eyebrow. She takes a deep breath and continues, her eyes locked on his face.*

You burned Ender's things. All of these emotions came out of nowhere and confused you to no end. A book you once read suggested that you burn the belongings of the departed person. You never really knew why. It just seemed like something you needed to do. Val caught you and slapped you. Hard.

Peter's breath catches. "Val told you."

Not that he knows how, or why Valentine Wiggin would have known this woman. But? It's only fucking logical answer.

The only one.

*Near the end of her rope, Alanna's eyes flash angrily.*

Val did not tell me anything. You never told her why you were burning Ender's things. Did she know that you watched her light a fire once, so you decided to do the same? That you scorched the earth the first time you tried? Did you tell her that Ender's departure hurt you in a way you couldn't understand? You felt like you should do it. You had to do it.

*Alanna runs a shaky hand through her hair and scoots around on the seat until her legs swing free. She's dangerously close to jumping up and trying to shake some sense into him. Still, her voice softens and she looks at him with imploring eyes.*

And it hurt you, Peter. Did you tell Val that? And if you had, would she tell just anyone?

And for a moment, the mask is unmasked and Peter looks at her with a gaze full of things he'd never want anyone to see. Mostly pain.

But then he catches himself, he gets his guard back, and the pain is clouded over again.

"Look, I don't know what kind of sick joke this is..." Peter starts, but something in his head is already holding him back. This... she... how the hell could she know that? He can't fathom it, he can't figure it out, but what he does know?

He doesn't have to take any of this crap.

"...but I don't have to listen to it." he ends, able to finish his sentence, but somehow unable to look at her.

*Alanna blinks, unsurprised and yet hurt by his response. Why should she be surprised? This isn't the first time they've had this conversation, and it went much the same way the first time around. Suddenly exhausted, Alanna slowly pulls herself back on the window seat and stretches her legs out before her.*

No, you don't. So why are you still here?

*Breathing deeply, Alanna struggles to control her frazzled nerves. She's very aware of the fact that she's about to either lose her temper or burst into tears. She would prefer to do neither of these things in front of Peter. Biting her lip, she thumps her head back against the wall and stares blnakly out the window.*

Peter hesitates for a moment, having made the mistake of looking at her.

But he can't back out now. He can't.

"Mom will bring in something to eat later, I'm sure." He says. "So you won't go hungry." As if that's the topic of the moment.

And with that, he makes a quick escape.

*Alanna nods, still not looking in his direction.*

Thank you.

*She flinches as the door shuts behind him.

As if she could eat anything.

As if she would cry any more tears over this whole bloody disaster. She's not crying. It may look like she's crying, but really... she's not.*

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