the_lioness | Jon's quarters

Jon is sitting on a chair pulled near the open door to his balcony, enjoying the peace and the night air. There's a glass of an amber colored liquid in his glass - let no one say that he is drinking to quell his nerves.

"Nervous?"

Without making much noise, Alanna appears by his shoulder and gestures to his glass. She speaks softly, loath to disturb the peaceful expression on his face.

He looks up and smiles. "Nervous? Why would I be nervous? I'm marrying the perfect woman tomorrow."

He gestures with the glass and manages to slosh some onto his shirt. He curses and swipes at the stain, then looks up at Alanna with a slightly helpless expression on his face.

"Well, maybe I'm a bit nervous."

"How odd, I was under the impression that Adam had married the perfect woman. Hmmm."

Smiling, she pulls a handkerchief from her back pocket and presses it against the soiled spot on his shirt. She leaves it there, motioning for him to move over and squeezing herself into the small spot beside him in the chair.

"I'd be worried about you if you weren't at least a little bit nervous."

He obliges, scooting over as he takes the handkerchief and dabs at the spot.

"It's practically traditional, I guess."

"I suppose that's why weddings are built up so much."

She watches him for a moment before turning to look out the window.

Quietly, "I did want to marry you, you know. In my own way. I just wanted to marry you on my terms, and I knew deep down it would never work."

He turns to look at her at that and answers just as quietly. "I do know that, and I knew that even at the time, I think. I was a stupid boy who had had his feelings hurt."

He reaches out and grabs her hand, squeezing it gently. "I think things have worked out nicely for both us, though. You seem so happy."

She wraps her fingers around his and kicks her legs out, much like a small child.

"Immeasurably so," she agrees with a smug smile. "I didn't mean to hurt your feelings. Or George's. I was too young and ill-equipped to deal with such things."

He elbows her in the side gently. "Stop that, Alanna. We both were too young and hurt feelings are part of growing up."

He reaches around with his other hand and tugs on her hair. When she turns to look at him, he sticks his tongue out at her.

Giggling, she does the same, raising the stakes by crossing her eyes.

"I just- It's all so hard to believe. It seems like mere days ago I was sitting vigil with you before your Ordeal."

Jon can't cross his eyes, it makes his head ache. So he lifts one eyebrow and waggles it at her.

He shakes his head. "I know. I can't believe it's been so long." He gives her a sideways glance. "I sometimes go down to the chapel room."

"Don't ever do that with your eyebrow again."

Alanna shudders, playfully making another face. She soon sobers, picturing the room in her mind.

"On occasion," she says, "I do the same. The chapel, the catacombs... Thom's rooms. Why?"

He grins evilly at her. "You're just jealous that you can't do that."

He squirms a bit. "I know we're not supposed to speak about our time in the Chamber, but Mithros, after experiencing it twice..."

"I can't even imagine what that must have been like." She sounds incredulous, concerned. "No matter what, Jon, you can talk to me. I'm sure the gods would understand."

"The first time was the worst," he admits. "It was like...being beaten very badly, but all in my head. Every fear..."

He looks over at her to see if there is any recognition in her face.

"All your fears, one after the other. And it was just so real."

Alanna nods, answering the unspoken question.

"At the end -- I saw things that helped me uncover Roger's treachery. That's one reason I couldn't wait."

He hisses in understanding, his hand tightening on hers.
"I finally understand it." He looks over at her. "That was one of the most terrifying moments of my life, seeing you standing there, the truth finally revealed."

He shakes his head. "My second time in wasn't nearly as bad. I think the Chamber already knew me - it focused more on showing me the kingdom, what the realm was. And then it connected me with all my people and the land." He gives a short laugh. "I had never been more glad for the rite of the Voice of the Tribes. It prepared me well. I don't know how the kings before me handled it."

"I'm not sure I would have managed it had I waited," she admits. "I'm sure it looked like madness to be accusing the king's cousin."

Listening, she rests her head on his shoulder.

"They did as they must, just as you have done and will do." She pauses. "What's it like? The moment of the Voice?"

She knows the answer, but it is suddenly vitally important that she hear it from him.

He glances down at her, smiling a bit.

"It's difficult to describe - it's both the most incredible experience and the most terrifying." He struggles to find the words.

"I'm connected to every mind that gazes into the fires, all at once. I can feel them there, reaching out, each with their own demands, needs, and hopes. I have to keep focused or it could eaily overwhelm me."

He pauses a moment. "I'm making it sound awful, but it's not. It's very intimate, being that close to the people, connected with them so tightly. It's exhilarating."

"I think I'd like to try now. Soon."

Enough time has passed that it seems more like cowardice than prudence to hold out.

He looks over at her and smiles.

"Good," he says simply. He's been waiting for this - so have the tribes actually.

He concentrates for a moment, and the wood in the fireplace bursts into flame, tinged sapphire blue. He turns to her and grins. "I know several girls who cannot wait to hear from you."

Focusing on the fireplace, she smiles. He always remembers that she tends to be cold. It's nice.

"Why is that?"

"They miss you, your little shamans. They still honor you and ask about all your deeds and actions."

He grins at her. "I have to be careful with my thoughts. I'm not sure I need to let them know about Milliways."

Laughing, Alanna shakes her head rapidly.

"They would likely think you were touched in the head. A tavern at the end of the universe, beyond the stars? Nonsense."

He laughs with her. "Indeed."

He sobers and takes her hand again. "Thank you for being here, Alanna. It means so much to me."

Alanna bites her lip and squeezes his hand, eventually working hers free so that she can hug him.

Quietly, "I've sat vigil with you before every other major ceremony, haven't I? It would feel strange not to be here."

"It would. I'm not sure I could through it without you."

He smiles and lightens the mood. "Look at the two of us. Married, grown up. Hard to believe."

"You aren't married yet," she points out. "Are you sure you don't want to sneak down to the Dove for one last night of freedom?"

She snickers.

He grins. "I'm not sure I can pull off 'Johnny' any more. I have a sneaking suspicion that my people might recognize me."

He stands and stretches. "I do think that a walk in the garden will do me a world of good though." He grabs her hand and pulls her up and into a huge bear hug.

Alanna smiles. She knows full well what he is hoping to find in the garden. Patting his back, she hugs him tightly for a moment and lets go.

"I shall see you tomorrow, bright and early. Do try to get some sleep. And now? I shall do the same."

She bows, grinning, and races out the door.

Jon's quarters

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